Parenting Plans for Older Children
A parenting plan is a written agreement that allocates both decision making responsibilities and parenting time to the parties in a divorce or parentage matter. When creating a parenting plan for older children, those who are in middle school and high school, there are different things to consider than when making a parenting plan for younger children.
The first thing to consider with older children is that they have an opinion and can articulate what they do and do not like. Under 750 ILCS 602.7(b)(2), the wishes of a child, while considering their maturity and ability to express independent preferences relating to parenting time, should be considered by the court when determining the allocation of parenting time if there is not a parenting plan in place yet. Since courts take into account the maturity of a child when considering their wishes, this factor of the statute may carry more weight with an older child who is able to articulate reasoning behind their wishes than a younger child who may not be mature enough to form these independent thoughts. For example, if the parenting plan requires parents to make decisions about extra-curricular activities and parenting time, it is easier for a child to provide input regarding what their preferences are when they are old enough to form these opinions. When the parties are working through these sections it is important to consider the activities the child likes participating in and will want to continue to participate in. It is also important to consider what school the child is currently attending and the friends they have there when creating parenting time schedules.
Parents should consider how many activities the child is participating in and make sure they are not over scheduled. Although older children may say they want to participate in multiple activities, parents need to make sure children are not overbooking themselves. Older children have more demanding academic obligations and parents need to make sure that their children have time to complete their homework as well as participate in their activities. Additionally, older children like spending time with their friends and may have social obligations to attend. It is important to consider how these obligations factor into children’s schedules and what they want to participate in when making a parenting plan.
Extra-curricular activities are important to consider when making a parenting plan for older children because it can affect where the child is sleeping at night and what parent they are spending more time with. Children in high school may have practices for teams or meetings for clubs that may affect any parenting time one might expect out of a rigid parenting time schedule that is easier to maintain with younger children. Parents need to recognize that teenagers have busier schedules and more required meetings and activities to attend than younger children. If parents can recognize this and make a parenting plan with this in mind, it will likely make the process easier for everyone involved.
It is important to consider where the child will want to go to school and where the child’s friends are if the parents are going to be living in different towns or school districts. If the parents are living close enough to each other that they can both transport the child to and from school or their activities, this may not be a hard decision. However, if parents are living further apart from each other, this is something that the older child should have input in. Again, it will make the future easier if the child’s thoughts and feelings are included at the beginning. These considerations may also change depending on whether the child has their driver’s license.
Typically, parenting schedules for older children involve the child spending one week with one parent and the next with the other parent. This one week on, one week off schedule allows for more stability and less transitions in a child’s life. This schedule also reduces the number of times children have to bring all their necessary belongings back and forth between parents’ homes. Older children will likely have more textbooks and more equipment for their activities to bring between their parents’ homes. If parents are able to utilize the week on, week off parenting schedule, it will likely make all transitions easier for everyone involved.
When making parenting schedules for older children, it is also important to consider spring and winter breaks from school as well as summer vacation. During spring and winter breaks some children may have commitments from school that they have to honor affecting parenting time or vacation time. In these situations, it is again important to listen to the children and see what they want to do during these breaks. Again, the parents will have to work together to create a plan that works for and is beneficial for all the people of the family. Summer vacations will also look different as children get older as there may be different camps the children want to attend or training for sports or clubs the children are part of in school. Parents will have to be realistic when creating these schedules that it may not be in everyone’s best interests to split the vacation times evenly, but instead to work with one another to create a plan that is effective and results in quality time together for everyone involved.
The Law Office of Erin M. Wilson is experienced in creating appropriate parenting plans for all children including children in middle and high school. Contact The Law Office of Erin M. Wilson at The Law Office of Erin M. Wilson at 312-767-4220 to schedule a consultation.
NOTICE: This blog is intended solely for informational purposes and should not be construed as providing legal advice. Please feel free to contact us with any questions you may have regarding this blog post.